A Story from The Other Side: (A Man’s Struggle, Interesting Story)

Posted: September 19, 2012 in Uncategorized

 Tuesday, April 10, 2012 at 4:24am 
An Interesting Story:
 -I am a 38 year old man. I have focused a great deal of time in my work and let love slip by in the pursuit of what I thought were greater things. Coming up to my 32th birthday things began to come into perspective when I met my girlfriend. I realized the importance of family and having one of my own, and my girlfriend agreed. We got married the year after and things were wonderful. This bed of roses however began to wither We tried tirelessly to get pregnant. I thought it was me and have spend a lot of money and time by doctors trying to get to the root of the problem but they found nothing physically wrong with me or my wife. Seeing as this didn’t help I became very depressed, and further saddened at the thought that I couldn’t give my wife children or possibly have of my own. I sought out therapy to try to cope with this to deal with my feeling of inadequacy as a man, while still trying in vain but less and less and losing all hope.
My depression got to the point of me turning to drinking, which also led me to be very aggressive, yelling at my wife often after and got the point where I nearly lost my job. My life was crumbling. This went on until I was seriously contemplating suicide. While looking through my wife’s drawer to find a notepad to express my final wishes and explain why I was going to do what I almost did I came across a bill from the clinic. I couldn’t believe my eyes, my wife was on birth control. Thinking that there must have been some mistake I went down to the clinic to enquire about this treatment. I almost passed out when it was reveled that this had been going on for the last 5-6years.
When my wife came home i confronted her with this, and (with tears in my eyes) the big simple question “Why?” Her response was “I wanted you but not children, you would have left me.” With this she bursts into tears and attempted to embrace me. I shoved her off and said “This is not a trivial matter. If I came home and you lied and I found a convertible in the garage, or the house orange, we could work it out, I would be pissed off but we need to discuss it, and those are not even big deals. You lied and deceived me, and robbed me of years of raising children. You drove me to depression and near suicide with a lie, seeing all along what it was doing to me. For what? To keep me?” Her tears didn’t move me, because I realized this; I was the victim here, not her. And with that I turned my back on her for good. –
Moral of the story: The same way Reproductive Coercion (forcing a spouse to have children) is wrong, Taking a contraceptive method being a spouses back is wrong. To take Woman as the victim and Men as the abuser automatically in all cases is not only Wrong, it is also Sexist. 
Written byPaul-Daniel Nahous(yes, I made up the story entirely to illustrate my point)

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